You’ve heard the rumors: underground bunkers, lizard people, secret societies. But they forgot to mention you, the real danger lurking at Gate C69.
Whether you’re seducing TSA agents or whispering sweet nothings to the horse with glowing red eyes (Blucifer knows what you did), this shirt is for the frequent flyer with zero shame and maximum mystery.
💼 Features:
- Soft, breathable cotton for staying comfy while being detained for ✨vibes✨
- Bold lettering that lets the DIA murals know you’re not scared — you’re horny
- Perfect for layovers, chaos, and flirting with flight attendants named Chad
🛫 Wear it to:
- Airport bars
- Secret tunnels beneath the baggage claim
- Conspiracy theory meetups
- Your next Illuminati initiation
👽 Let the people know:
The aliens? The Freemasons? The time-traveling lizard elites?
They could never.
🔍 SEO Keywords:
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🏷️ Tags:
#MileHighMess #BluciferBaddie #ConspiracyCutie #TerminalChaos #FlyMeDaddy
Discover more at EllieShirt.com or view the original product here.
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